Keyboard
Written on 12:35 AM by c meridian
This is what I got.... the new Apple keyboard. Me likey.
Dis-gusss-ting
Written on 12:31 AM by c meridian
"How The Cookie Crumbles"
So I'm at my new job. Busy as hell... but I still had time to get grossed
out by the keyboard. You know I took over this marketing exec position from
a lady. A sulky fierce bitchy one in fact. I see her sometimes, staring at
me like I stole her job, oh wait I did! Ha. That lady (let's call her Miss
D) didn't exactly part the company on very good terms... and you want to
know what's the worse news.... she's dating the guy who sits in the cubicle
behind me. So it's hard for me to receive praises or give my comments on the
past work (no matter how constructive) without looking like an ass to some
of the other workers who know Miss D.
The exact thing happened today... I just received my 10,000 copies of flyers
which I oversaw the production from start to the end. So for just 50
dollars, I received better looking flyers with 105 gsm paper instead of very
frail and cheap looking 85gsm art paper.... I was approached by a colleague
who wanted to see the flyer. I showed it to her and explained how much nicer
the flyer looks with thicker paper at very marginal price.
She said "Be careful of what you say. The old brochure was done by my
friend..."
Wow...
On the subject of Miss D. Not only have I inherited her friends as my foes,
I've also become heir to her desktop computer. Oh yes... and you know which
part of the computer are you most in contact with?...
The keyboard, of course. And this one is so nasty... every time I type a
key, I gag a little with my own vomit.
Looking at the cracks in between QWERTY, I can see crumbs of 7 different
kinds of cookies, dried skin, stapler, nails, hair, dust and what looks like
dandruff. I'm not talking like one or two pieces of debris. This is like as
if the keyboard had its own sewage system. It is GROTESQUE.
I can't stand that bitch or her revolting leftovers in the keyboard. I've
got to give my desk a total makeover. I decided to change the keyboard...
One more day using that keyboard, god knows what I'll contract from that
cookie monster aka dirty whore.... Over the weekend I went shopping for a
keyboard.. and of course... what comes naturally to mind....
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